“That is a really cool … (fill the blanks)! I want to have this!”
Before you entered the shop, you didn’t even know this piece existed, but in a moment it is yours. Trading money – cash or credit? – and you’ll take it home. It’s this thrill, the excitement of the new, the power to be able to possess it now. Wait, until you can show this to your spouse/best friend/neighbor/co-worker/boss (tick the box). Gosh, how they are going to admire you for it.
Or maybe not? Or you already forgot about it before you even got home, because you bought the other cool thing next. And you realize that this new thing does not really fit your kitchen. Or this shirt doesn’t pair as well with your clothes as the sales person made you believe.
I bet you made this experience already, eventually multiple times. And then, did you do it again and again? Probably. But why?
Companies make us believe that without this really cool … (fill the blanks) you are not complete, not worthy, you’re on the wrong side. The whole consumer industry plays this tune – buy it and you will be better. Get this car and you can go up the mountains to have some great family time. This new gown magically transports you to the casino, where you will be the star and win the jackpot. And a breeze of the latest perfume makes you feel 20 years younger. And don’t forget this new gadget, though it feels you just bought one last year … wait, you did … anyhow, you need the newest one.
We know that this is all not true, and still we fall for it. “We all eat lies when our hearts are hungry.” In this increasingly complex world it is undoubtedly hard to identify the values you want to define as yours, that provide guidance on where you want to go, or to hold steady on things that are truly important to you.
If you no longer own the things, but the things own you, it is time to pause and rethink. What do I trade when I buy the stuff just because someone I don’t even know tells me to? Beyond the money that you will now have to earn again (potentially in a job you hate), it is the mental burden of regret, the uncomforted feeling of living in a cluttered space, and the emptiness that remains.
To buy or not to buy – resist the urge. It’s okay to say “This … (fill the blanks) looks cool … and I don’t need it. Thank you.” Even better, rather than spending time in a shopping mall, visit a museum, an exhibition, the local zoo or botanical garden, or just stroll in a park. You will find tons of new and interesting … (fill the blanks) that you will enjoy without having to possess them.